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February 1, 2019

Octodad: Dadliest Catch


I cannot condone the events of this game. I cannot side with the dissimulation, the camouflage of non-humans among us.

That's the most squidlike human I
have ever seen.
On January 30th, 2014, Young Horses brought to us Octodad: Dadliest Catch, the second Octodad game (I haven’t played the first). How to accurately describe this… well, it’s a family father going about his day, supporting his wife and kids, and following them around. You could be excused for thinking that this guy is normal, if a bit kooky. He speaks weirdly, and yet everyone understands him. Maybe he’s foreign and he has an accent? And his way to walk around…. So weird! But, let’s not make fun of him, maybe he has a physical disability. And that mustache looks bizarrely fleshy and squishy. But hey, who knows this man’s story, right? Asking would be rude. He almost got me fooled, too! But then I remembered: The game’s called Octodad, and the store page spoils that detail immediately.


This is an octopus hidden among us! How unacceptable! And he fooled a woman for ten years, even married her – that’s the very first level! Scandalous! This is also where you get to experience the controls.

That might not seem so complicated.
Good luck mastering this, though.

He makes a mess everywhere he goes. Even the clumsiest
anime girl isn't nearly that bad.
See, Octodad: Dadliest Catch is one of those games on Steam where the controls are poor on purpose; after all, you can’t have a squid walk on four tentacles without constantly losing balance! Everything in this game is done through the mouse. Octodad’s controls are split between Walk Mode and Interact Mode. In Walk Mode, each leg made of two tentacles is a button of the mouse. Move the mouse around to move Octodad, left click for the left leg, right click for the right leg, so on. In Interact Mode, you are in control of one of his hand-tacles, and move it around. The left button is used to grab an item or let go of it (and you can walk around while holding items), while you must press and hold the right button to change the height of Octodad’s tentacle, so you can grab items either close to the floor or located higher. The middle button on the mouse is used to switch between both modes.

People are getting suspicious. It sure takes them a long time to figure
this out, though!
Simple to learn, very difficult to master. Especially because those damn tentacles move erratically and quickly, so precision gets tossed out the window. Merely getting from Point A to Point B can be difficult! Why did this octopus decide to live on land? Was he living in a cave under the sea, with a functional TV, catching episodes of Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy, finally getting reruns of I Love Lucy and going “Yep! That’s the life I want for myself”?

You might wonder if there’s any dangers in this game, and there are; Octodad has a suspicion meter, which fills up anytime he acts weird while people are watching him. If the bar fills up entirely, Octodad falls to the floor like he’s trying to hide or playing dead. Some humans out there can see through his disguise, and merely being in these people’s field of view is enough to raise the meter.

What were the songs at the wedding party? In The Navy?
Under The Sea?
Seriously, can nobody figure out that this guy isn’t human? He doesn’t wear a mask, not even a wig! And there he goes, to marry Scarlet, a human woman! He’s struggling to even get his suit on! The honeymoon will be something special. I wonder what this guy’s into… Of course! BDSM!

After Octodad successfully marries Scarlet, we skip to ten years later, with Octodad dreaming back to those days, as he lays in bed in the morning afternoon. The alarm goes off, and the cephalopod gets up and greets his little family… including his two children? Where do these two come from? …I think any answers we get to that question would only confuse us more.

I heard: "Tommy, you lazy kid, shouldn't you be mowing
the lawn in my place?" Odd what a few blubs can convey.
Thus, the second level has him going about his day: Grilling hamburgers, mowing the lawn, chopping wood. I love how this squid manages to get himself understood even without speaking any language – the subtitles only ever indicate the general gist of what he says, so you can fill in the blanks. Like when he scolds his son for not mowing the lawn. I only speak a tiny bit of squid-speak, but even then I don’t think any amount of “Woomy”s are going to help me through a conversation with this guy. I could try talking his language, but I might insult his mom by accident.

Maybe these two will understand each other.
(Image from this page of the webcomic Level 30 Psychiatry)

Later he has to hook a birdhouse to a tree, and that’s when he gets attacked by some nasty Japanese chef on a giant mower. Hands-down the best character, Fujimoto is the only reasonable person in this entire goddarned universe, seeing through the disguise and trying to get rid of Octodad. A bit intense, but… Go Fujimoto! However, Octodad hits lawn gnomes and breaks Fujimoto’s mower.

Whoa, when did this game become action-packed?

I had to break the fridge door from the inside in order to get
my frozen pizza. I'm pretty sure I broke a law or two.
Scarlet is an investigative journalist, and her next paper is about the local aquarium. She wishes to bring the family along, but Octodad sees it more like visiting a prison – gee, I wonder why – so he refuses. She tricks him into coming with them by stopping by the grocery store first. And since in this universe nothing is ever simple, Octodad has to figure out how to get the items on Scarlet’s grocery list. Why is the only bottle of soda attached to a plane? Why is the last frozen pizza behind literally frozen doors? Worst of all, why is there a yellow apple among all the red ones? Throw in another attack by Fujimoto, and we’ve got a party! Go Fujimoto!

After this stop, Scarlet brings the entire family to the aquarium, and drags a very unwilling Octodad along. It’s not just a prison; it’s also home to multiple humans who can see through his disguise! Marine biologists live in public aquariums, right? With how silly this game is, I wouldn’t be surprised if that was the case. After getting tickets, they walk inside and the family splits into three of the attractions.

"OH NO EVERYONE HERE CAN TELL WHAT I AM,
OH POSEIDON I AM SO THOROUGHLY BLUBBED"

*blubs about wanting to be acknowledged as an
expert of arcade games*
I quite enjoy what you can do from this point on: You’ve got three levels, and can pick which one to do next. Visit the dark and scary Deep Sea with Octo’s daughter Stacy (again, better not question it). Go through the educational tour World of Kelp with Tommy, Octodad’s son, who is reluctant to learn anything at first, but he soon finds that the area has plenty of games to enjoy, even a big playground. Last but not least, Scarlet is in the Amazon Arcade, trying to have a serious talk with her husband about the weird things happening around him, but he keeps playing arcade games instead. Each level has its own feel and mood, but all three are notable for ending with a particularly tough challenge (respectively: Climbing descending escalators, reaching the top of a large playground, and patching a fish tank’s holes while a room is getting flooded).

My favorite moment from those levels may be in World of Kelp. One room has prop otters, and you can take the head off an otter and put it on. Many levels in the game contain those accessories that Octodad can wear for part of the level.

*blubs of feeling particularly cute with this thing on*

Octo bought that tie for... a poultry sum.
As a matter of fact, each level has three ties that you can look for. You can choose one of them in the main menu, and Octodad will wear it throughout the game! Some are well-hidden, and I swear there’s at least one in each level that requires incredible precision and acrobatics on our squishy protagonist’s part. Good thing there are fan-made guides to help players! Yes, I went for the tie with a hen on it. I’m sorry, I just cannot say no to a good hen tie once in a while. And a dad’s not a dad if his tie isn’t a dad joke.

After these levels, Octodad sees Scarlet on top of the big tank in the aquarium and goes to speak to her, only to realize it’s a decoy built by Fujimoto. The mad chef rips Octodad’s clothes and tosses him into the tank. The tank that contains the largest hammerhead shark ever caught by man.

Oh, I'm going to jig like you've never seen a squid - er,
a human! - jig before!
We get a backstory level showing the start of our character. He snuck aboard a fishermen’s boat, took the captain’s outfit, and all the sailors began treating him as the captain. That is when he foundScarlet, who had also snuck aboard, and where he met his current enemy, Fujimoto the chef, who keeps blabbing about a war. You can slap him behind the head with a fish, and that’s an achievement called Cod of Duty. Really? The guy’s talking about an armed conflict, and you don’t call this achievement Cod of War? Shame.

After getting rid of the chef in this flashback, Octodad remembers where he is, and soon has to flee from the giant hammerhead shark. This chase continues in the pipes and other installations of the aquarium, leading to impressive visuals. The big issue with this segment is that you must hold down the left button to build momentum and let go to be propelled forward, but when the shark comes in, you need a horribly precise timing in order to escape it. This part is so hard, you're guaranteed to lose multiple lives just getting the timing down in the first area. Good luck for the rest!

At least it's pretty. I'm not joking, this level is friggin' tough,
but it's gorgeous.

After getting rid of the shark, Octodad returns to the main area and sees his family looking for him. They’re approached by Fujimoto, who offers to tell them everything they want to know about the patriarch of their family, and they follow him to the cafeteria.

*blubs about wondering if he put this thing on backwards*
Octodad has to get to them, and he finds his way back outside of water. It’s the evening, employees are cleaning up, and he has to sneak past them. Find a disguise, or don’t. Cause a ruckus in the employees’ dining room, or not. Steal a hammerhead shark mascot costume, maybe. So long as you get to the cafeteria. Octodad loses any clothes on the way, so he’s naked when he gets there. Fujimoto holds his family hostage, trying to tell them about the octopus, but they don’t believe him. Well, until Octo shows up in his birthday suit. Scarlet and Tommy are shocked. Stacy isn’t, Octo’s daughter thought everyone knew already. Oh, sweet summer child. Also, Scarlet, you lived ten years with your husband and you never saw him naked until now? Something went wrong in your marriage, lady!

A suitably epic finale for... a comedy game.

Fujimoto, I was rooting for you, but this time you went too far! The ensuing scuffle causes a fire in the cafeteria, and Octodad has to save his kids by building a path on the rafters over the cafeteria, allowing Stacy to pull the sprinkler lever. After which, the whole family teams up to take down Fujimoto for good. When the chef is defeated, Octodad gives him a hug and expresses his love for mankind, and the chef realizes his mistake. As he leaves, the family reunites. Hey, maybe an octopus living among us ain’t so bad after all, if he’s trying to be a good person. Er... Octo-person.

Aaaand, perfect "Everyone laughs" sitcom ending!

On his date with Scarlet, Octodad has halibut.
It looks pretty good.
That’s the plot. However, there’s more to do in this game. For starters, one bonus level can be found (by Octodad flushing himself down a toilet at the aquarium). It happens almost exclusively on a 2D plane, mostly in darkness. You also unlock two Shorts, which are longer levels with a lot of tasks to accomplish. The first, titled “Dad Romance”, shows Octodad’s first date with Scarlet at a restaurant, which includes him being mistaken for the restaurant’s new waiter, and thus he has to work in the kitchen as well. The second short, “Medical Mess”, is a story told by Tommy and Stacy about their dad working as a nurse at a hospital. With guest appearance by everyone’s favorite left-handed surgeon klutz, Nigel.


Yes, that guy. Well… that hand.

*blurbles a hello*
Both shorts and the bonus level have three ties each as well, bringing the total to 39 ties that can be found in the game. But that’s not all! If you still haven’t had enough of Octodad, head by the Workshop, which contain many fanmade levels. That’s still not all! There’s a multiplayer “Co-Op” mode as well. What does it mean? No, there aren’t two Octodads; you and another player share control of Octodad’s limbs. Want this to be even more difficult? The Roulette Mode will randomly switch which limbs each player is in control of, after every reached goal within a level. Good luck.

Oh, this is a damn good game.

Why are these escalators going down when I have to go up?
Of course, the entirety of this title is built around the simple premise of a boneless cephalopod doing mundane everyday tasks that would be very easy for a normal person. And the controls reflect that. Everything’s done through the mouse, which is thematically appropriate. Though some moments are very difficult, or require large motions (the climbing of the escalators comes to mind), so be careful not to break your mouse. (For a moment, I was afraid I did.) The tone of the game is hilarious as well, with all these people being incapable of seeing through this poor disguise. It’s an old comedy trope taken to its logical extreme.

Is there a Mustache Pull Mode to this Super Octodad 64?
The biggest issue with the game is that I definitely want more. The game is rather short for its 15$ price tag, and can be finished pretty quickly. Although I would argue that the game is better if you play it with the intention of making huge messes everywhere you go… though that’s not so much an intention as a certitude. Although, if you do wish to play it some more, you can always seek to get as many achievements as possible, or find all the ties. That particular task can prove to be very difficult at times. The main game’s short length isn’t so bad when one takes into account these added challenges as well as the bonus level, the two Shorts, and the fan-made content in the Workshop.

Some segments are annoying. Climbing ladders is always tough, but that’s no surprise. Some levels end with especially difficult tasks. Plugging the leaking tank in the Amazon Arcade, for instance. Or climbing up the playground in World of Kelp. Or the shark chase. God, the shark chase, if there’s only one level I genuinely hate, it’s that one. (Thankfully, that one is interspersed with beautiful moments of peace.) Some ties are also very tough to get, the worst one in my opinion being on top of a crane on the fishermen’s boat.

Almost there...
I will get this tie even if it's the last thing I do!


*blubs expressing hatred for turnstiles*
*more blubs about being STUCK IN THE WALL!!!*
I didn’t run into any glitches while I was playing. Although not a glitch, sometimes Octodad tends to get stuck in places, and you have to shake the tentacles wildly to get out (and sometimes, restart the current level goal). The graphics look pretty nice, just cartoony enough for the setting, and the music is quite good. A highlight is the music during the final level, a choir of… blubs. No, really. One of my issues is the camera, which works just fine at times, but some things can become hard to achieve merely because the camera's not quite at the right angle.

Last but not least, it's a shame we can find all kinds of items that Octodad can wear, but can't keep anything but the ties we find. We could use a Dad Customizer that gathers all these items and allows us to mix-and-match them before getting into a level.

All in all, an amazing game. I loved it. But let’s face it, no matter how much he tries, Octodad ain’t human. I respect him more now, but he’s still an animal pretending. Not like that Chicken Boo guy!


Now THAT is a real man!

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