Hello
again, everyone! I've overcome my anger caused by last week's game,
and now I realize Halloween is one week away! I'm really in
the mood for some scary stuff. Thankfully, everyone's favorite video
game company is here again! ...I meant Nintendo. It's up there, right
in this article's title!
Like the Boos: HOW DID THEY BECOME THAT WAY? |
Nintendo
doesn't go very often into disturbing territory- Oh wait, yes, it
frequently does. But most of the time, the disturbing part is in the
implications brought forth by the situations. The scariest moments
aren't necessarily the ones that are scary as soon as you see them,
but they become terrifying once you think about it a little more. There's
just an art behind horror, which hides behind everything, as long as
you make an effort to think about what's really scary in what you
just saw. Heck, something that didn't seem too creepy at first can
turn out to be very frightening once you take into account the details.
The
examples below are all scary moments from the franchises we grew up
with, moments that might have scared us more than we thought... and
only now do we see the true horror. Though, to be fair, scary moments
just had to show up in a medium where characters can get killed in
thousands of different ways and come back, minus one life, to see it
all again. And since this list is made from what I consider scary,
you might find odd some of the choices; I guess I prefer realistic
fears, even those set in unrealistic universes, to the unrealistic
fears that pop up in fantastic universes like those pictured in the
main Nintendo series. Enough talking: Let the countdown begin!
12.
A monstrous, deadly instrument (Super Mario 64)
Gosh, that thing's got TEETH! |
If
I had to pick among the quick moments of horror from Nintendo series,
I would have a lot of options in the possible deaths and Game Overs alone. If I had
to pick a monster that marked me, it would be difficult. A jump scare that
actually works? That's easier. Do the words “Mad Piano” mean
anything to you? If you've played Super Mario 64 or, in particular
Course 5, “Big Boo's Haunt”, you know what I mean. There's always been something
unsettling about the Boos, who only creep in on you when your back's turned, so a whole level dedicated to them is
bound to scare a few. But then Mario enters a rather empty room, with
a piano sitting in the corner. Mario approaches... and suddenly
twang! Zwang! Ba-waaing! The whole thing comes to life, the top turns
into a giant mouth with sharp teeth, and the piano starts jumping
towards our red-clad plumber! It's not the kind of thing you see
coming. Sure, a piano in a haunted house may seem fishy, but with all
the other things in there, a piano still seemed like the least
dangerous object. This has scared many young gamers and even
surprised some older players. And nowadays, when I see it while I
play Super Mario 64 DS, I try my hardest not to hear the creepy notes
caused by this moving piano. Brrr... Yet, that's relatively tame
compared to the rest of this list... (probably because a piano cannot
really leave its room, but I digress.)
Also: WHO CREATED THAT MONSTER???
Also: WHO CREATED THAT MONSTER???
11.
Pollution, monsters running rampant (Donkey Kong Country)
A wonderful place will soon be wrecked by an ecological disaster. |
Donkey
Kong's Island is a beautiful place with many locales situated around
a giant DK head carved in stone. It looks incredible with the Super
Nintendo's 3D graphics. But that entire ecosystem is endangered by
the evil Kremkroc Industries, led by the clearly insane King K. Rool.
What are those factories for? No idea, but they're located near the
top of the island, close to snowy mountains, and it's safe to assume
the pollution is slowly descending to reach the rest of DK and
friends' world. It's not scary? Yeah, we've been beaten over the head
so many times with environmentalist messages that by the end, they
stop meaning anything. A subtle environmental message is difficult to find. But here, the Kremkroc Industries are an
entire world to visit, and it happens late enough in the game that
you've got a taste of Donkey Kong Island's beauty beforehand, in the
preceding worlds. In other words, you know this place is beautiful,
and then you learn, too late, that the Kremlings are polluting it to make it uninhabitable. It's already happening, and you
cannot stop it. Donkey Kong Island is doomed to be polluted by one of
its resident species.
10.
Your troubles suddenly grow enormous (Super Mario World 2: Yoshi's
Island)
The
drawn style of Yoshi's Island could have been thought up so that kids
don't piss themselves with fear while they're playing a game about a
Yoshi traveling with a baby Mario on its back. This game is scary.
Scary, scary, scary! Many enemies are scary, some bosses (who are all
enlarged enemies) are scary, some settings are unbearably creepy...
but the final boss takes the cake. Kamek grows Baby Bowser thanks to
his damn spell, and the young Koopa grows so large that not only he
destroys his own castle, but he is apparently thrown far away. During
that fight, Yoshi has to throw eggs at this giant Baby Bowser to
prevent it from getting too close, which means instant death. Giga
Baby Bowser leaves nothing but destruction in his wake, and could
very well be an unstoppable foe, if only there weren't balloons
bringing giant eggs for Yoshi to throw in the bratty turtle-dragon's mouth. By all
accounts, this battle should have been the end of Yoshi and Mario.
They've been saved by a lucky coincidence. And without that random help, Mario would have never been there to save the Kingdom... because he would have been killed at the time he was an infant.
9.
You see by yourself the effects of madness (The Legend of Zelda:
Twilight Princess... and a few more)
You don't need to be a human to be insane. All you need is a mind... And it just so happens that every thinking being has a mind. YOU could go nuts someday. No one's safe from insanity. |
Ah,
Zant... I don't think I'll ever stop making fun of you. No matter how
threatening you seemed to be, in the end you were just a pawn in
Ganondorf's plan, and a raving maniac at that. I'm not saying that you need insanity to be a good
villain, but there is definitely something about madness that makes
some evil characters even more threatening. Zant had been calm
through most of The Legend of Zelda: Twilight Princess, and then for the one true fight against him,
he gives in to the madness and OHMYGOD is it suddenly worse. He
laughs, he jumps around, he teleports himself and the hero in many
dangerous places... He's what would happen if a clinically insane guy
suddenly got superpowers. You know, magic powers used by evil
entities is scary, but in a way, insanity is scarier. You start
wondering how did the guy begin: Was he sane at first? Did prolonged
exposure to darkness turn him crazy as well as evil, like it happens
most of the time? There is something deeply fascinating and
terrifying about madness, which is the reason so many horror stories
deal with it in a way or another.
Then there are the ones who say a mad villain who suddenly goes mega-supra-bonkers is actually funny. To me, it depends on the character. Sometimes it's scary as Hell, sometimes it's funny.
Then there are the ones who say a mad villain who suddenly goes mega-supra-bonkers is actually funny. To me, it depends on the character. Sometimes it's scary as Hell, sometimes it's funny.
8.
Now your enemy has grown even larger (Super Smash Bros. Melee)
How could the world of Smash turn him into this abomination? |
We
had Giga Baby Bowser earlier; now we have Giga Bowser. Melee made
Bowser even scarier by turning him into a complete demon. It was a
shock, too, as this boss could only be seen if you beat the Adventure
Mode in less than 18 minutes. A Bowser trophy would fall on the
stage, get struck by lightning... and come to life, turning into the
most horrifying incarnation you'll ever see. Mario fans knew
Bowser would do anything to overcome his enemy, but he hardly ever
transforms into anything scarier than what he already is. At worst, he
just grows bigger to try and squash Mario, but he never tries to
become more monstrous in appearance. Here? Holy crap, he becomes scary. Heck, Giga
Bowser wouldn't feel out of place in a kaiju flick, if he was a few
hundred stories high. The kicker, though, is that the final Event
Match in Melee has the Player Character fight against Giga Bowser,
Ganondorf and Mewtwo – a villainous team-up that most likely
wouldn't work anywhere else than in a Smash Bros. Game. ...And then, in Brawl, Bowser gains the ability to become Giga Bowser thanks to the Smash
Balls... This character was quite a surprise when it appeared, and
trust me, when you're surprised by something scary, you will remember
it a long time.
7.
Leaving nothing behind but a desolated desert (Pokémon Colosseum /
XD: Gale of Darkness)
This is a most unwelcoming place for Pokémon and humans... |
I
didn't get the chance to play those two games much, but my friend the
Pokémon fan has them and absolutely loves them. Colosseum
and XD: Gale of Darkness take place in Orre... a desolated wasteland
where crime runs rampant. The place is such a wasteland that not even
Pokémon want to live there! Not even desert Pokémon! There's a
cruise ship in the middle of a desert, for Arceus' sake! That one was
caused by a Lugia whose heart has been “sealed”, which basically
means Team Cipher brainwashed a Legendary Pokémon into doing their
dirty deeds. That cruise ship alone, crashed in a desert, implies all
the passengers were killed, either by Cipher goons or with the ship's
fall caused by Lugia. We never quite find out what made Orre the way
it is now, but one thing's clear: It will never be a safe place. This
story is the perfect representation of the dangers inhabiting the
Pokémon world: Almighty Pokémon, the madmen who decide to use them
for their own evil goals, and terrorism as a whole. Because that's what the Teams are: Terrorists. And all the dangers of terrorism these days are, sadly, truth. (For the sake of posterity, I must say that this article was published the same week an illuminated ally of the Islamic State shot a soldier outside of Canadian Parliament, then entered with the intent of killing more people. Earlier this week, another person who had become an ally of the Islamic State tried to run over three soldiers in Quebec with a car, successfully killing one of them.)
6.
The demon hidden within a friend (Kirby and the Crystal Shards)
Those eyes on the Fairy Queen, on the right... She's not alone in there... |
I
made a big deal about the Kirby series and how its dream land is just
a cover for eternal nightmares. Just in case you didn't know, just
take a look at Kirby and the Crystal Shards. The first final boss,
Miracle Matter, is a powerful foe, but not quite terrifying yet.
Until you realize, during the “victory” cutscene, that evil is
still there, hidden under the traits of the fairy queen. You haven't
won yet. Whatever Miracle Matter was, it was just an underling. Only
once you've collected all the Crystal Shards do you see the true
villain, 0² (Zero Two), brought out of the fairy queen's body. And it
is terrifying. An angel form of Zero, a past boss who was just a
bleeding eye; except this time it's got many means of attack. The
boss itself wouldn't be so scary if the false ending didn't tell us
this monster could take possession of other beings, which is and has
always been a subject for horror stories, though it usually involves Satan. The boss fight itself
wouldn't be so bad, if only 0²'s eye wasn't bleeding so much...
5.
It's over, you can only wait for the end (Majora's Mask, Super Paper
Mario, a few others)
Mankind
kind of loves torturing itself with the apocalypse. Whether it's the
Y2K bug, the Maya calendar, the second coming of Christ... name it,
we've all heard at least one nutty “the world is ending” theory.
Video games pull this through: The world really IS ending, sometimes.
It's coming, everyone knows it, and unless the heroes can do
something to stop it (and there's no guarantee there), they are all
doomed. We've seen this story in a multitude of games, brought up in
just as many ways. The only two examples I give are the descending
Moon from TLoZ: Majora's Mask, and the growing Void from Super Paper
Mario. That feeling of helplessness, the awful sentiment that you
must accept what's coming, and life goes on despite this sword of
Damocles over the world's head, ready to strike... Some villagers
decide to live with it, or despite it, and go on with their lives as
normal. Others start praying and helping heroes. Others succumb to
madness. Stories about the apocalypse are a great way to study
character psyches, and are ultimately linked to a primal fear most,
if not all, of us have: The fear of death, the fear of the end of all that is.
It's coming... It's coming... It's coming... It's coming... IT'S HERE!! |
4.
An individual with a dark past (Super Paper Mario)
Image by SpadeNightmaren on DeviantArt. Don't you DARE tell me Mario villains cannot be scary! |
3.
You see Death, now, at long last (Many, many, many games)
You lost. The bad guy wins, folks. |
2.
Documented facts about creatures (Pokémon series)
The Pokédex: A source of many sleepless nights! |
Watch a series of videos by Jwittz about creepy Pokédex entries.
Oh, and another list of scary thoughts about Pokémon.
Oh, and another list of scary thoughts about Pokémon.
1.
The abyss of time, source of endless horrors (Mother 3)
To be fair, you probably know Porky better as "that 'kid' riding the spider mech in Brawl". I hope that rings a bell? |
Wow,
this was a LONG list. I'm not sure if that's because I needed to
explain a lot more, or because I went more into analyzing why I found
those moments scary... But that doesn't matter. I hope I've given you a
few chills. Scaring isn't exactly what I'm good at. As you might have
guessed, I prefer psychological and metaphysical horror above the
other kinds, though I'm not above watching a good ol' slasher film
once in a while, or Heck, supernatural horror films like Final Destination or Insidious? I was thinking about buying Oculus as soon as it comes out on DVD.
As
for next week, Halloween winds up on a Friday. You know what that
means: A Halloween Special! Can I give a clue? Hmmm... Maybe. Maybe
not. Maybe I can... but I can't get clearer than this:
T̲̻̳̗̀ͮ̒̾̉͜A̗̍ͤͫ̊̽R͖̦͍̪̤̫ͯͧͩ̍̍͘Ḝ̼̼K͖͈̲ͨ͛̔ͩ͢
̛̤͍̪̪͔̇ͫ̀ͤ̌͌Ḫ̗̣͓̯͚͕͐̉̃͐̅S̵̜̺͗C̹̾ͪͪ̅ͣ̚A̛̖͇͒̍̒ͦͩȨ͇̱͕͕̞̳͉͒͗͐̀
̼̺̔ͣ̀̆ͬͯE̟͎̤̼ͯͬ́̎̒́̏T̷O̶͙̫͚̼̱̙̿ͭ̾̃W̪̭͈̲ͅN̔ͩ͑ͩͮ̂ͪ
̡̦͛̌ͭͥ̈́ͬM̭̗͍̤̗̻̋͊̀͆̚E̤̙̭̼̓̽͂̎̓Rͩ͑̒͏̝̯͈̼̳̖A̘̣͇͕ͪͯͨͥŚ̻̳̖̝ͫ̄
Unless the zalgo texͯ͑̒͝t̞͕̩ͩ̓͒̐ ̘͔̼̩͆ṡ̠̟̰̓͘t͆̐͌̀a̮̳͉̣̗̙̹͆͗̿̄͆ͬ̋r̴͎̻̙͍͖̖t̥̫̲̺̜̬̼͑́̈́͜ș̺͆͋͝ ̫̋ͅt̡̻͓̳̲͙̜̋ͯ́ͧ͛̌̈oͥ̇̉̄̿̇ ͏͕̯̪t̤͇̤̞̙͎̺͢a̳̞̞̞̓k̩̈ͬ̂ė̙͈̱ͥ͌̊ͫͩ̚͢ ̵̱̟̝̭̞̊o̯̯̩ͮ͊ͪ̇v̵̞͙̣̩̋̓̓̓e̢̼͚ͤ͋͛͆͂rͭ͆ͣ̚͡ ̼̣͕͕ͦ͋ͣt̖h͕̦̟ͤͬ͒̑͟eͤ́̅ͤͨͧ҉͕͇̫̮̪͙ ̬̯̠̣͔̃ͨ̉ͮs̶̬͓̘̝̿̓ͯ̅̑ͨ̃i̖͔̅̈́̀̒̿̄͌̕t̯͍͔͍ͅͅe͐ͦ̓͐̒ͯ̂͘-̵̖̯̭͎̱ ̗͍o̯͔͎̰͓͜h̬̼̹͎̿ͫ͌ ̻̀̓̂͛̑͂̊̀c̶̦̪͕͔͛̋ͩͯ̚r̤̫̖͙̗͊ͨ͝a̙̱͍ͪͦ̉̈́̽ͦ̕p̯̙̩̙̼.̯̙͙̱̩̈ͨͤͬ̇̀͗.̰͌ͥͦ̈́͆͘.̮̩̼̥ͦ͝ͅ
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