Quick Review: Balatro

Oof, I’m in for some addictive gameplay. I better not lose myself into this one. …Too late.

Developed by LocalThunk, published by Playstack and released on February 20th, 2024 (I know, I’m a full year late to the party on this one), Balatro is a very unique deck-building roguelike based entirely around poker hands, Jokers, and a myriad of special cards.

Two pairs? That should do the trick for now...

A run is divided into Antes, themselves divided into three Blinds: One small, one big, and a Boss. The latter throws in an additional effect to disrupt your strategies. The score required at each blind increases. A run is "won" if you can beat the boss of Ante 8, which will usually require you to score 100,000 points. You can choose to skip a non-boss blind, which grants a small reward in return.

Before playing a hand, you can discard multiple times, up to 5 cards, and then draw as many. Judge which poker hand will give you the biggest score and try to gather all the pieces. Then, choose your cards – again, up to 5 – and play them. The system will only play the cards that count (ex. If you play 5 cards but only have two pairs, one card won’t be scored). Be careful, though; you have limited discards, and you must reach the score in chips in a limited number of hands.

Oh, I've got a good feeling about this one!

The hands go from the simplest High Card all the way to the Straight Flush or beyond. Hands all have a base score and multiplier (Mult), which you can level up using Planet Cards founnd in the Shop. This can add up, and may encourage players to focus on one hand type over another.

At the top of the screen are your equipped Jokers. Every Joker has an effect that radically changes gameplay; many of them add to your hand score (Chips) or Mult. Some rarer Jokers may even multiply your Mult. Jokers can come in different editions, which can impact the scoring or the base game (Foil, Holographic, Polychrome or Negative). You start with only five slots for Jokers, but can gain more (thanks to Negative Jokers).

Let's make sure the planets help as much as possible.

    Too bad I seem to already have all my Jokers. Then again,
maybe I can get a better one up there.

After beating a blind, you earn the base money reward, extra cash for each remaining hand you didn't play, and even some interest. Then you access a shop screen with randomized Jokers, a voucher, and card packs. Vouchers cost 10 coins but will provide passive bonuses and changes to gameplay; the packs can include Planet cards, Tarot cards (which can modify cards from your deck), regular cards for your deck, more Jokers, or even the rare Spectral cards, which can heavily change your run.

2,900e13? Yikes.

Can you figure out the best combination of effects to beat Ante 8? Can you… go beyond? The further you go, the bigger the numbers become; by Ante 14, blind chip scores need to be expressed in scientific notation because the numbers are too damn big. The last time I saw scientific notation in a video game was in an idle clicker! And oh yeah – there are 15 different “Decks” to unlock or use, each with their own special effect, AND on top of that you can also unlock additional Stakes to make the game harder. Imagine winning Ante 8 with every Deck, at every stake. Ouch.

Ugh, how I dislike boss blinds with face-down cards...

Yeah, this is extremely addictive. This is very much a roguelike; you never know what you’ll land on at every turn, and you make do with what you find. Some runs will end prematurely, some will go far (but not far enough)... or maybe you’ll win. There’s so much content to find, and so many secondary challenges, that if you want to beat the game just once, you’ll need maybe 10 hours (at least for the time it should take to learn all the mechanics and how they can be changed through gameplay). I know I was hooked; by the time I wrote this paragraph, I had spent 20 hours in this alleged “quick” game, and I had only beaten it twice (at publication, I've now won 9 times). Be very careful; when you start playing this one, it’s hard to put down.

Balatro is available on Steam for 14.99$ USD.

Still addicted, send help

Quick Review: Agatha Christie - The ABC Murders

Starting strong with a literary classic adapted to video game! While I can’t call myself a huge reader of Agatha Christie’s works, I have read a few of her stories – but not today’s. Good! That means I’m not spoiled!

It's a Poirot story - it's always a murder. (And for those not
in the know, that's pronounced "pwah-row").

Developed by Artefacts Studio, published by Microids, and released on February 4th, 2016 for PC, PS4 and Xbox One (and on Switch in 2020), Agatha Christie – The ABC Murders is adapted from the Hercule Poirot novel of the same name. The quirky, mustachioed Belgian detective was hoping to enjoy retirement with just a few simple cases from now on. This peace is troubled when his London office receives a typewritten letter signed A.B.C., discussing an upcoming murder in the town of Andover. A challenge for the aging gentleman! The first victim’s initials are A.A., and she is found dead with an ABC (a dictionary-sized book of train departure times to all destinations in England) on her, left open at the A section. Aided by his friend Captain Arthur Hastings and Scotland Yard inspector James Japp, Hercule Poirot might be able to see beyond the mind games and find the culprit.

Poirot concludes that this woman is both sad and angry.
He's a better reader than I am.

Poirot can inspect people’s appearances to reach conclusions about their mental state, and then interrogate witnesses and suspects to get information. Most body observations stop at three details to spot on the person. Investigating scenes goes the same way – bring the cursor to an area, hover on it long enough, and a detail will be “noticed”. This is how you can find clues and information.

We've figured out the how, now to figure out the who and why.

Occasionally, Poirot will “put his little grey cells to work” and tie pieces of information together to reach logical conclusions. Some questions appear ahead of time, and you can try to solve them before the plot mandates it, though you may be missing the clues/observations needed for completion. There are no consequences for failing, so if a question has you stumped but you have all the clues, you can keep trying different combinations of clues until you catch the right one.

All this for a piece of paper? Can't I just pull it out?

The centerpieces are the puzzles, in which objects are tampered with to find new clues advancing the investigations. Some require information found in the current chapter (like a safe’s code), while others require keen observation to figure out how to take them apart. Most of them aren’t too difficult, but a few are tricky if you can’t spot the one detail you need to see to proceed. I did get stuck on one or two of these, but most weren’t so bad.

Careful, it's best to not piss off the suspects, just in case
they're volatile.

The biggest weakness of this game is that, while its story covers the entirety of The ABC Murders, it’s also very rigid about progress. Outside of moments where youmay not notice a clue or a way to move onwards, the game is otherwise easy, with most sequences being impossible to lose (and, in the case of the puzzles, the only failure is being unable to finish them). There are no repercussions for mishandling an interrogation. You gain some “experience” by behaving like Poirot, which means conducting everything to perfection and being gentle when asking questions (or showing narcissism by making him stare at himself in every mirror, I got a kick out of that), but it doesn’t offer advantages.

It's the kind of game where I love the story (or, at least, how it interprets the story it adapts to an interactive medium), but gameplay is very much a mixed bag. Observations of relevant characters are always too easy; observing relevant objects on various visited locations can be a tiny bit trickier, but you can just focus on what feels relevant and you’ll quickly get through them as well. Much of the game is just too easy – but if you’re just in it for a classic Hercule Poirot story, you’ll get exactly what you want.

Agatha Christie – The ABC Murders is available on Steam for 14.99$.

Pokémon Ultra Sun/Ultra Moon (Part 4)

Pokémon Sun/Moon: Part 1 – Part 2 – Part 3 – Part 4 – Part 5 – Part 6

Pokémon Ultra Sun/Ultra Moon: Part 1 – Part 2 – Part 3 – Part 4

Finishing this today!

Ending the Island Challenge

What will Primarina do? Oh, it has options.

With the Necrozma crisis resolved, we can finish our trip across Alola. Nic talks to Mina to go directly to her boat home on Seafolk Village. She presents her trial: First, he'll battle her Fairy-type team. After she’s defeated, her true challenge begins, and it requires minimal work on her part. Mina gives him one petal. He's told to go battle some of the trial captains (Ilima, Lana, Kiawe, Mallow, Sophocles, Acerola) and collect their petals. Then, bring back the whole flower to Mina to lure out the Totem. A clever idea that doesn't actually force you to backtrack across the whole game, but it feels like a challenge worthy of the final trial.

Go, Sophocles, give it all you got!

I find it funny just how many of the Totems we fought
we Bug-types. Maybe Guzma was on to something.

Every trial captain has a team with levels in the 50s, and these battles are throwbacks to previous events. You don’t fight every captain; You always fight Ilima and Kiawe, but Mallow and Sophocles are fought in Ultra Sun (with the latter bemoaning that his friend Molayne is leaving), while in Ultra Moon you fight Lana and… Acerola isn’t available, so you re-fight Nanu instead. We even get a scene with Guzma, at Aether House's entrance; he has turned over a new leaf. Return to Mina, and a Totem Ribombee is summoned; it can call for Blissey or Pelipper for help. When it’s defeated, Nic gets the Fairium-Z.

After which, we take on Poni’s grand trial, which means fighting Hapu’s Ground-types. This takes place on Exeggutor Island, and she couldn’t be happier to occupy her new place as kahuna. Victory nets Nic the Groundium-Z, and an invitation to meet the Elite 4 at the top of Mount Lanakila.

This place has more visitors than when I last visited.

As a repeat from Sun/Moon, Gladion awaits at the mountain’s elevator, and gives his all in a memorable battle. His team includes Type: Null, freshly evolved into Silvally. Once again, he loses, but is quite proud of how far they’ve all come through this adventure. After which, it’s Mount Lanakila; it’s roughly the same, with two major differences. The first is the dozen Trainers to be fought in there. So it’s not a Victory Road with puzzles to solve – but it feels more like one than before! The second: This is where you can find Necrozma, back to its basic form. It can be caught.

Huh, didn't know Hawlucha could have a poison move.

There’s still a Pokémon Center at the top, but no Hau battle. Kukui waits at the entrance, inviting Nic to go through and become the first Champion. The loadout of the Elite 4 has changed. Hala is replaced by Molayne, Sophocles’ friend and a Steel-type expert. The other three members (Olivia the Rock-type user, Acerola the Ghost-type user, and Kahili the Flying-type user) have teams swapped around, each with one or two Pokémon that differ compared to S/M. Can’t leave once you begin – either you beat all four, or you lose. Once you’ve won, you gain access to your throne as new champion of Alola.

Lycanroc is past-Rock-type. Uh oh.

But it won’t be that easy! Who comes in to contest your title and claim it for themselves? Nope, not Kukui; it’s Hau. The final boss is your rival. I preferred having Kukui as my true opponent, as the Professor’s team was unpredictable; but you’ve been fighting Hau regularly, so you have some idea of his team loadout. The starter weak to yours, an Eeveelution strong against your starter, an Alolan Raichu, and three more… He’s appropriately tough, and deserves being the final opponent for the main game.

Yay to Alola's first champion! Woo!

Hau loses. He looks sad, but takes it well. The new Champion of Alola is celebrated on Melemele Island. We get vignettes of what other people are doing; Guzma renounces the criminal activities of Team Skull, but his gang will follow him no matter what he chooses to do next. Gladion leaves to train in another region (instead of Lillie). This time, we’re not taken aside during the party to fight Tapu Koko; nah, that’s later.

Postgame

So, what else is there to do? There’s a big one, but first: Everything else.

After becoming Champion, Nic is approached by the Ultra Recon Squad. At least one Ultra Beast was spotted on Poni Island, and we must catch it. It’s a different species in each version: Blacephalon in US, Stakataka in UM. There's two to catch, so you can trade one for the other.

Great, one more clown out there.

Ah, yes - Cosmog "Get-In-The-Bag" Nebby II. Or just Nebby.

Catching stuff: Everything in the Ultra Wormholes, including the original seven Ultra Beasts and all Legendaries, but also every species you can find using QR codes. And, of course, the one we’ve been forgetting: Zygarde, waiting in Resolution Cave, northwest of Poni Meadow. The four Tapus can be battled and caught. You can retrieve Nebby from Lillie at Mahalo Trail – and using the opposite Altar on Ula’ula, you can obtain an additional Cosmog to send to the other game and evolve into the Legendary you don’t own yet. You can get your own Type: Null as well!

I do wonder what I could do, yeah.

Is battling more your groove? The Battle Tree still rests at the end of the Poni Gauntlet, a trek across the fourth island. The mode's three battle types of battle are now split into Regular and Super versions. In Regular, your Pokémon keep their current levels (all opposing Pokémon are still Level 50), while in Super, your team’s levels become 50 if they were higher. Kukui can be fought and added as a battle partner in Multi. The real difference is that, this time, you can purchase every Mega Stone, even those of Pokémon outside of the Alola Dex. (The Beach Points from Mantine Surfing can be used as currency here!)

All the Tentacool, way too many Tentacool.

Then you can look for every Z-Crystal, including species-specific ones; every Totem Sticker, and the Totem Pokémon you receive from Samson Oak as rewards; level up your Festival Plaza, almost unchanged from S/M, and get the bonuses from it (…less interesting without the Wi-Fi connection); and get the highest score on every Mantine Surfing course, which can net some nice rewards, including a Surfing Pikachu.

Damn, to go from a small-time crook and reject of society
to potentially Alola's champion... Mad props, Guzma.

Title Defense returns once you’ve defeated the Elite Four a second time. After you've gained access to your throne, you have no idea who you’ll be battling next. One month after seeing the credits for the first time, you can encounter Gladion, whose Silvally is equipped with the Memory of the type strong against your starter. Other returning opponents include Hapu, Hau, Kukui, Plumeria, Ryuki, Sophocles and – yep – even Youngster Tristan! There's two new opponents, and it’s awesome to fight them here; the first is Guzma, the second is Lusamine.

But this all pales compared to…

Episode Rainbow Rocket

Yeah, I bet you'll tell us. Ready to gloat, huh?

Nic is called in a panic by Sophocles, who says Festival Plaza is overtaken by a group wearing black and red. Team Rocket have showed up. You can beat their grunts. Is that all? Nope! Aether Paradise is in turmoil; Lusamine’s mansion was transformed into a giant castle emblazoned with a large multicolored R. There are Team Rocket Grunts on the way to the castle. Lillie is ready to help Nic, mostly providing quick heal to his party.

They face Faba, who reveals himself as a turncoat; anything to further his career! This dude is ready to team up with ecoterrorists, omnicidal maniacs, psychopaths, genociders, and the mafia, all at once, if it means going up in rank; what a piece of shit! He engages a double battle with another Aether employee against Nic and Lillie. After they're beaten, we can move on and weed out the evil.

While exploring the Castle, the kids are cornered by more grunts. However, Guzma shows up to help! He’s mighty pissed at what happened at Aether, so he lends a hand. Guzma and Nic fight the grunts and win. Guzma will stay back to make sure no other grunts attack by surprise, while we deal with the rest of Rainbow Rocket.

Guzma gets a redemption arc - Hell yeah!

For the record, MunchingOrange is using here a special
emulator that boosts the image quality of the 3DS games
played on it. Not sure whether I'd be at risk naming it, so
I won't.

Nic explores the castle and encounters the leaders of the previous villainous teams, starting with Archie (Team Aqua) and Maxie (Team Magma), met separately. They both state they were pulled from a world in which they had won, where there was no exceptional Trainer to stop them, but where they were about to die. These games predate Spider-Man: No Way Home, yet that’s exactly the feeling I’m getting. Each of them has access to their Legendary (Kyogre and Groudon). Giovanni never told either of them that the other also was in Rainbow Rocket, since they both hate each other and have opposite goals. Once they’re defeated, they both find out the other was here too, but they’re teleported back to their worlds before they can come to blows.

Nic accesses the upper floors, where he battles Cyrus of Team Galactic (who owns Dialga or Palkia), and Lysandre of Team Flare (who has his Mega Gyarados, and either Xerneas or Yveltal). I'm always down to beat up a Nazi allegory. (Yep, I still hate Team Flare with fiery fervor.) Beating these two reactivates the teleporter in Lusamine’s room.

Was gonna say I should have kept the Alolan Raichu
nearby, but then I remembered that Mega Gyarados
is part-Dark.

He dared hit Lillie? Okay, new plan: Shoot this asshole
till his remains are unrecognizable.

Before we can use it, Ghetsis comes out, wearing his fucking tacky tower dress. The dude is already thinking of multiversal conquest, by way of stabbing Giovanni in the back. Yep, that’s Ghetsis alright. This guy will always deserve an ass-kicking. His team is topped by Zekrom or Reshiram. After he’s defeated, Ghetsis slaps Lillie and threatens to kill her if Nic doesn’t surrender. Never mind the Pokémon, he should get fucking shot for hitting a child. However, Colress (who worked with Aether) shows up to rescue everyone. The scientist has invented a device that can create small wormholes that can send these guys back where they came from. Which he did to the others, and does to Ghetsis. Good riddance.

In the playthrough I use, Mega Mewtwo X was beaten
in just one hit. Some final boss...

Giovanni awaits in the secret lab, and he’s tough. Final boss of the entire handheld era of Pokémon. His team is mostly Ground-types, with one exception: A Mewtwo, which he boosts with a Mega Stone (in Ultra Sun, I fought Mega Mewtwo X). He's tough, but he is defeated, and when he disappears, the mansion returns to normal. Lusamine is fine. All Faba gets for his treason is to be demoted to intern. Not even banned? We’re too kind to these types. A final scene shows that this vile version of Giovanni may reappear someday…

Alright, let’s wrap this up at last.

Final words

Well, now you have!

Comparing Pokémon Ultra Sun and Ultra Moon to their predecessors is inevitable; these new games take a lot from Sun/Moon and replicate most of what they offer, but try to improve everywhere they can. For starters, the story: I think I personally preferred Lusamine as the villain, as she gets reduced to a damsel in distress here. (Twice, if we count Episode Rainbow Rocket.) While the concept of the Ultra Recon Squad is interesting, I think these games don't do enough with it. And although Necrozma makes for a very memorable, climactic boss and antagonist, it will probably be remembered far more for the big battle against it than for everything else.

A few trial challenges are massively improved,
so there's that.

The Island Challenge "story" barely changes, which leads to the awkward position where the Ultra games’ plot is too like S/M, with minimal differences in scenes and NPC encounters – it makes the first half a slog if you’ve played the previous games. (The railroading tutorial that is all of Melemele doesn’t help, since it has several more things to teach you.) On the plus side, many secondary characters get even better moments to themselves, like Hau who learns to get serious in his Training even if he can still have fun, or Guzma who gets a redemption arc. Your mileage may vary on which story is better; S/M or US/UM? There are good arguments either way!

To say nothing of the Totem battles, which all
employ new tricks and are more difficult
to deal with!

Gen 7 compensated on the criticism of Pokémon X and Y being too easy by ramping up the difficulty – and the Ultras may be the mainline series’ hardest games, period. Trainer levels are higher, and opponents use tricky strategies. Even the Trials, Alola’s centerpieces, are modified to present tougher challenges, especially for those expecting the Totem Pokémon from S/M. Ultra Necrozma is so hard you practically must cheese the fight to win it, and the Rainbow Rocket episode pits you against powerful teams. Speaking of, both that episode and the possibility of catching most Legendaries makes these games a great tribute to, as well as a last hurrah for, Pokémon’s handheld era.

Gameplay was streamlined; 101 extra Pokémon to find and catch in the Alola Dex, areas for special evolution types are available sooner, and several tweaks were applied to improve the experience. While no new Alolan forms were added, four new Ultra Beasts and a Mythical were added.

You can reasonably sink a few hours into
the Poké Finder, the Pelago, Mantine Surfing,
the Battle Tree, the Ultra Warp Ride, and so
on and so forth.

Most of the major features return, all improved a bit; the Festival Plaza (with new facilities), the Poké Finder (new Pokémon to catch on film), the Poké Pelago (more species, new items to be found by your adventuring Pokémon). None of these are given tremendous boosts, but there’s a little something. There was also an attempt at improvine the Rotom Dex, by making it more like a virtual buddy, but it comes with the downside that it becomes annoying once it’s at max friendship with the player, blocking use of the bottom screen to give unsolicited advice at every scene transition. The only saving grace is the Roto Powers, which do end up being useful.

Some Legendaries are locked behind owning
two previous Legendaries (ex. no Kyurem
until you have both Reshiram and Zekrom).

Trading the Zygarde cells and cores for Totem Stickers isn’t bad, since you get unique rewards for collecting them. Mantine Surfing is addicting, there aren’t tons of rewards to it (though the Surfing Pikachu is nice), but it scratches that itch of going for high scores. To say nothing of the Ultra Warp Ride, found late-game, and everything you can find through it – boosted shiny chance, lots of Legendary Pokémon… that one made the price tag worth it.

Yes, Pokémon Ultra Sun and Ultra Moon have more content. Just enough to feel like fuller, more complete games. Spend long enough playing them and you won’t feel like going back to Sun/Moon for any reason. Reception was average at first at the thought many fans had of replaying essentially the same games just a year later. But hindsight has since done its thing and we can safely say that these games "eclipsed" their predecessors. (Heh, see what I did there?) You aren’t getting a bad game if all you've got is Sun/Moon; but given the option between these two or their Ultra releases, go for the latter.

Phew! I hope I’ll never have to do another 10-part anniversary review again! Wait, something's not right...

"Pew!"

…Nebby, get back in the fucking bag!

Pokémon Ultra Sun/Ultra Moon (Part 3)

Pokémon Sun/Moon: Part 1 – Part 2 – Part 3 – Part 4 – Part 5 – Part 6

Pokémon Ultra Sun/Ultra Moon: Part 1 – Part 2 – Part 3 – Part 4

Time to fight Lusamine.

Aether and the portals

Well, I guess I'm already proving to have a better chance
at beating Necrozma than you do, Dulse.

The doors to Lusamine’s room are guarded by the Ultra Recon Squad. They, too, want to get their hands on Cosmog. Dulse battles Nic, using his yet unevolved Poipole. Which gets defeated, of course. The big reveal: The Squad is working with the Aether Foundation to control Necrozma, who’s becoming dangerous. They were looking for Cosmog, because they need its power to open Ultra Wormholes to their home dimension, after which they want to send powerful Trainers through to battle the beast and calm it down. Lusamine, who is NOT a psychopath in this one, is helping, because she has Alola’s best interests at heart, even if the only solution looks very shady in retrospect. And, oh yeah – Colress, met on Route 8, is lending a hand with the process.

Her feelings stem from bitterness and anger rather than
insanity, so she feels... sanitized compared to the previous
version of her. Even her lines are sometimes changed to
be less rude when she talks.

…Honestly, Lusamine was one of those “love to hate” characters in S/M, even if the games implied that she wasn't herself and both her husband’s loss and the Nihilego neurotoxins caused her change. She is still horrible to her kids here, believing they both betrayed her (Gladion fled with Type: Null, Lillie took Cosmog), so she’s not a great parent, though some of this can be excused with stress. She’s still ready to experiment on, or kill, Cosmog if it means saving Alola, though! Her motivations and goals make more sense; catching an Ultra Beast could let her study and stop them, and perhaps find out where her husband disappeared. She hates Ultra Wormholes, but if beating Necrozma is what it takes to save Alola… Doesn’t change the fact that this feels like a downgrade, even if something bigger and stronger awaits down the line. (Also, she still has the frozen Pokémon in her lab, so there’s still some weird shit going on with her.)

Sorry ma'am, I gotta beat up all your cute Pokémon.

The President disappears through a teleporter, which Nic takes. He arrives in a secondary lab, where Cosmog is held in a crate. Everybody arrives (Lillie, Hau, Gladion, Guzma) as Lusamine restates her desire to go in the Wormhole and battle Necrozma if she must. At her children’s objections, she opts to demonstrate her strength by battling Nic. Her team is still made of cute Pokémon… which can still beat yours if you're unprepared. Upon her defeat, she tells Nic to continue his island challenge, after which she opens the Ultra Wormhole and jumps in with Guzma.

The kids leave the lab, with Cosmog transformed into Cosmoem, and report to Wicke about the President’s disappearance. Dulse and Zossie show up, angered that Lusamine is doing this on her own; but they mention that other Wormholes may be accessible through Poni Island's altar. They leave, and the kids get some rest before continuing their adventure.

When Nic walks out, Lillie has changed into her adventuring gear. She’s ready to explore Poni Island! Gladion gives them the Moon Flute and a Master Ball. Hau cann’t come along, he needs to catch up on his trials. I appreciate that the ensuing discussion is different from that in  S/M, mostly pertaining to Lusamine’s motivations. Lillie and our player character rejoin at the docks, with Gladion taking them to Poni Island.

Poni

And she has a pre-Elite 4 trial, this time!

Seafolk Village, still beautiful. Instead of the Chief of the Seafolk, we meet Mina, the Fairy-type captain. She's a bit spaced out, but she mentions that Hapu is more likely to know who the kahuna of Hapu is. Trainers in the Poni Wilds are a cut above the rest, but nothing insurmountable; and wherever Nic goes, the new Lillie joins. On the Ancient Poni Path is Hapu’s home, as denoted by Mudsdale in the front yard. The girl says there isn’t a kahuna on this island at the moment (again – shaking my damn head), then says there’s probably an answer to be found at the Tapu’s ruins. Nic obtains from Hapu’s grandma the Machamp Shove, to push large boulders around. Can’t sequence-break, the Canyon is guarded by a Black Belt who says Nic needs the kahuna’s approval before entering (even though there is no hakuna at this very moment!!!).

I wouldn't expect tourists on the alleged most dangerous,
most wild island of Alola - but hey, if they have the
Pokémon to face the wilderness...

Not pictured on a still image: The Alolan Exeggutor at the
back, which headbangs like it's listening to an especially
intense death metal song.

In the Ruins of Hope, past the Poni Breaker Coast, we watch Hapu being sworn in as the new kahuna, succeeding her late grandfather. The newly-appointed kahuna knows where to summon Alola’s Legendary Pokémon, but it requires two flutes – Lillie has one, we need the other, kept on Exeggutor Island. Back at Seafolk Village, we ask the village chief, who'll take Nic to the island; but this time, Lillie can’t join. Exeggutor Island used to be a trial site, and still operates like one; you help three Alolan Exeggutor bothered by Pinsir. I’d almost expect a Bug-type Totem guarding the Flute! The palmtree Pokémon lend a hand afterwards as thanks. Nic gets the flute and returns to Seafolk Village.

Probably a Ground-type move, since Mareanie is
part-Poison.

Back to the Canyon’s entrance, blocked by one Team Skull Grunt gal and five guys. Once again, beating them all is the best battle we’ve had involving them in the whole game. The sore losers don’t move until Plumeria tells them to leave. She asks the duo to rescue Lusamine and Guzma, and hands over a Poisonium-Z.

Glad to have Machamp to help - not that he's useful in a lot
of places. Maybe access to some locked areas on the
previous islands.

Nic meets Hapu under the Vast Poni Canyon's dead tree. The Ultra Recon Squad shows up. Dulse claims he wants his people to be able to deal with Necrozma themselves, and wants to prove they can do it by defeating strong Trainers. He challenges the player again, with nothing but his Poipole. Get more, buddy! He loses, but the Squad is reassured by Hapu that if they need help, they can count on the people of Alola. We gotta reach the Altar of the Sunne!

This place would make a better Victory Road than Mount Lanakila, I swear. Strong Trainers, Lillie getting through her own Trial by walking the high bridge. More Trainers right at the exit of the Dragon-type trial; just an empty corridor with the local pseudo-legendary coming in for a battle. The Jangmo-o line, topped with a Totem Kommo-o that can call Noivern or Scizor for help. One victory, and the Dragonium-Z is ours!

Two dragons versus one fairy. I wonder who wins.

Necrozma Revealed

Nic and Lillie get to the altar of the Sunne, with Hapu behind them. The two get into position to play the two flutes… The music forces Cosmoem out of Lillie’s bag and evolves it into Solgaleo! (…or Lunala, in Ultra Moon, you know the deal.) We can climb onto this steed and fly into the Ultra Wormhole to defeat-

....I love how Solgaleo looks, but damn that cry is weird.

…Wait. Something’s not right.

...Uh oh.

Yeah, shit's gotten real.

A wormhole opens, and Guzma and Lusamine fall out. She tries to tell the kids to flee, right as Necrozma floats out menacingly; Necrozma floats menacingly out of it as well. This monster is too powerful. Nebby battles Necrozma around the altar, but the monster is victorious. It absorbs a defeated Nebby, taking on a new form (the one on the box art). The monster summons wormholes all over the altar and across Alola. Hala and his grandson Hau encounter a new Ultra Beast, Blacephalon, only for Tapu Koko to get in the way and fight against the threat. Every kahuna encounters one of these monsters.

Nic battles (Dusk Mane or Dawn Wings) Necrozma, but cannot catch it. The beast escapes through a wormhole that appears beneath it, at the same time stealing all of Alola’s light and plunging the islands into darkness. All looks lost, but the URS shows up. Dulse mentions that Necrozma seemed intrigued by Nic’s Z-Ring. Well, they have a Lunala (or a Solgaleo in Ultra Moon) that they can ride into wormholes, which they call Ultra Warp Rides. We can be sent into a wormhole to battle Necrozma and return the light.

"How far from here is it?" "We're talking about light-years."
"...Oof, that's pretty far."

But if you want to level grind first, good luck – the light is gone everywhere, which makes it hard to see where you’re going. You can still ride Charizard around the islands to see how they’re impacted, but I wouldn’t recommend exploring in low visibility. But trust me, you’ll need to level-grind; what awaits in this wormhole is one of the toughest bosses in Pokémon history.

Into the Warp Holes

Nic talks to the Squad and asks to climb onto their Legendary Pokémon to reach their world. The portal into Ultra Space opens, and we enter the Ultra Warp Ride mini-game.

Also, the first time you do the Ultyra Warp Ride you are
forced to use the 3DS's gyroscope. ...Whyyyyyyyyyy.

You control the Legendary using the Circle Pad, within a corridor between universes. Your steed gains speed when you pass through yellow balls of energy – this will also allow it to go further. You must also avoid the blue, electrified balls, which will slow you down. Warp Holes come in five colors: White, Blue, Red, Green and Yellow. You can enter one on your own by flying into it, or if you’ve lost too much speed you’ll get sucked into the next one.

I know I should go into the white portal, but...
I wanna see what's in the double-ring one so bad!

There are four tiers of warp holes, noted by how many halos they have; none, one,  or two halos. Tier 4 warp holes have a flower-like bloom pattern around them. The higher the tier, the better what you can encounter. When you land in an Ultra world, you’re told how many light-years you travelled; better warp holes become more common the further you go. Each warp hole color leads to a different land: A cliff, a bay, a rocky field or a cave. White warp holes instead lead to special areas. However! The first time you go through a white warp hole, you land in the Ultra Megalopolis, the Squad's original world.

Lemme guess, Zossie is the newest recruit, then?
The Squad girl visiting Alola is practically a kid.

You are greeted by the other version's Squad (so, in Ultra Sun, I met Ultra Moon’s Alola visitors, Phyco and Soliera). Necrozma sapped all the light from this world, whose scientists attempted to brighten using technology, with limited success. Long ago, people of this world chipped at its body, eventually creating the Z-Rings found in the Pokémon world. And due to the broken form it was bent into as a result, the evil creature is less capable of controlling the light it has taken frm Alola. It awaits atop Megalo Tower. Nic climbs the tower and encounters the Necrozma-controlled Legendary, still sucking up light. A prism extracts from it, and the whole creature transforms into a giant illuminating dragon with detached wings: Ultra Necrozma.

Light =/= good.

Yeah, this thing can, and will, one-shot most of your team.
And will do so as long as you don't find a trick.

This should be the game’s final boss! Geez! Your Pokémon may be strong, but this thing is Level 60, gains a Totem-like boost to all its stats, and its base stat total is higher than Arceus’. Its typing is Psychic/Dragon, its Ability further boosts the power of super-effective moves, and it has coverage against pretty much all types (except maybe one or two), so it can tear into your team with ease. It’s likely to one-shot every single member of your team before you could even set up a plan. Don’t get me started on Photon Geyser, Necrozma’s signature move, which will use its current highest Attack stat (Physical or Special) and ignores most abilities. Pray you’re not Nuzlocking this game.

MunchingOrange's strategy was constantly swapping between
a Fairy-type and a Dark-type, nullifying the Necrozma AI's
regular use of its most powerful attacks, while his Dark-type
also had Intimidate, causing Necrozma to lose Attack as well.

There are two ways to beat this thing: Either you keep training your team in the Ultra Wormholes until they can survive one hit from this monster, then hope for the best… or you cheese it with strategies like Destiny Bond, Mimikyu's Disguise, swapping in Pokémon with immunities to attacks you know it’s about to use, or any combination of things that can give the upper hand early on or end the fight prematurely.

I kinda dislike that boss, to be honest. If you haven’t designed yourself a team that can take it on, you’re pretty much fucked. You can't know what you're fighting until you're fighting it, and get your ass handed to you. And training against it is a huge pain in the ass due to the darkened Alola. I don't hate the concept, but it could have been tweaked a bit.

Can it evolve? Oh, it can? Now I'm interested.

Anyway, let’s say it’s defeated. It falls to the floor and all the light it has stolen returns to Alola, brightening the world anew. Necrozma disappears into another world, while Nebby is sent home. Nic is joined by the second Squad. Their Poipole expresses interest in the Trainer, so they give it to him. Nice! There’s not much else to do in Ultra Megalopolis, but we can still return to it later (especially if we declined Poipole the first time). The only other reason to return is to switch which Legendary you want to do the Ultra Warp Ride on.

Guess it's just a goodbye with Solgaleo...
...and Lusamine and Lillie, of course.

Nic returns home. Dulse and Zossie confirm that Totem auras and Z-Powers are remainders of Necrozma’s light. The two choose to stick around. Lusamine realizes the wrong she did, and thanks the Trainer by giving him more Beast Balls. Nebby is weak, but the President of Aether promises to heal it back to good shape, even asking her daughter to lend a hand. Even Guzma seems to have learned good lessons out of all this! After everyone else has left, Mina shows up and announces that she has her own trial now – and that we should take it on.

Exploring Ultra Space

I’ll cover this right now. The wormhole still exists, so you can play the Ultra Warp Ride. White wormholes will take you to the Ultra Beasts’ worlds, where you can catch them! The wormholes closer to the start take you to the first beasts (Nihilego, or Buzzwole/Pheromosa), while you must go deeper to find the rest at higher odds (Xurkitree, Kartana/Celesteela, Guzzlord).

Ooh, that's a Hoenn bird. I'mma catch it.

Abomasnow usually have green feet. Ultra Space
Pokémon I have double Shinies of include Nuzleaf,
Drapion, Grumpig and Sigilyph. I've been trying to
find a shiny Audino for a long while.

The colored warp holes all lead to tiny areas with just one battle against a non-Alolan Pokémon. There’s 5 possible encounters in each area, for a total of 20. All Pokémon found this way will be Level 60. Another reason to explore these Wilds? Their Shiny odds start at 1%. Even if you only land in the first warp hole each time, one Pokémon out of 100 will be Shiny. The Shiny percentage increases depending on both the warp hole tier and the distance you travelled. 3-ring warp holes start at a 16% chance, and can go all the way up to 36% (more than one out of three) if you’ve gone further than 5,000 light-years! In my boxes in this game, I don’t just have Ultra Space shinies, I have freaking doubles of Ultra Space shinies. (Still no luck for a purple Audino though.)

But here’s the biggest reason to spend hours here: Something else is hidden in these Wilds. The odds of encountering something very special are at 3% at the lowest tier, and goes up the further you go, all the way to a 100% encounter rate in the fourth tier, if there’s any left to catch. I’m talking about Legendary Pokémon.

Even before I started hunting a few Shinies in Ultra Space,
I went and hunted down every single Legendary.
Holy crap that quest was awesome.

One aspect I’ve seldom discussed about the Ultra games is that they feel like the end of an era; past this point, all Pokémon mainline games and remakes are on Switch. The proper “handheld” era of Pokémon comes to an end with US/UM, and as a result, they also serve as an attempt at a proper send-off. Which may be why 37 Legendary Pokémon (no Mythicals), from Mewtwo to Yveltal, can be caught in the Ultra Wilds. No other Pokémon game has given you the ability to find and capture every major Legendary.

Yeah, the first half of the game is way too much like that of Sun/Moon and tedious to get through, especially if you played the prior games, but damn, this one part here? Makes it all worth it.

Alright, we can resume the island challenge and finish it… in Part 4!