Rabbids Rumble

In preparation for this review and the next, I revisited the four games I reviewed back in February 2015. My criticism of them still stand. I won’t come back on them, you can just go back to read those reviews instead. Speaking of, I think I strained my arm with the cow-tossing mini-game again. Peachy.

I remember loving these games so much, I spent an extra part listing my favorite and least favorite mini-games from each title (using the abbreviations RRR – Rayman Raving Rabbids -, RR – Raving Rabbids – and R – Rabbids – to keep things shorter). RRR1, RRR2 (for DS and Wii), RRR TV Party… and of course, those were only the beginning. These were followed by Rabbids Go Home, which marked the clear divide between the original trilogy of games and every one that followed. Rayman was no longer the victim of these invaders’ antics… Nah, the humans were the victims instead.

You could call it... an invasion.

After which the franchise grew bigger and bigger, with entries for home consoles and portable devices. “RR Travel In Time”, where they take their madness to various epochs of human History; “RR Alive and Kicking”, which makes full use of the Xbox Kinect; “Rabbids Land” on the Wii U; “The Interactive TV Show” discussed in last week’s review, along with the TV show; and “RR: The Big Plan”, a VR title because you just have to have bunnies literally come at you now. But it was released only for the Google Daydream, so meh. There’s a few games on iOS as well: “R Big Bang”, “R Heroes” and “R Crazy Rush”. Oh, and a cheap Facebook game that never let you have any chance of moving forward without paying real money. Because that's how Facebook games work. Then, last year we had the massive smash hit “Mario + Rabbids: Kingdom Battle”, released for the Nintendo Switch, and which lovingly mocked every overused trope under the sun of the Mushroom Kingdom. Put that one in the list of crossovers that worked surprisingly well. It was like Ubisoft hosting a friendly roast for a franchise belonging to their adversary.

But of course, there’s also today’s game, Rabbids Rumble. This one was developed by Headstrong Games rather than Ubisoft, and was released on November 13^th, 2012. It was released solely for the Nintendo 3DS, for a simple reason: This game makes full use of the portable console’s capabilities. You’ll notice that mini-game collections do that often. I even remember when I bought this one: January 2015, G-Anime, first convention I ever went to. Hey, what’s a convention if not a great place to buy used games? As a fan of the Rabbids, of course I jumped on the occasion to buy this one!

Just look at the box. Looks fun, doesn’t it? A bunch of Rabbids dressed in various silly disguises, ready for a brawl. And the back of the box says there’s over 100 Rabbids to collect in this game! 100 different battlers! And there are still mini-games, too! What’s not to love? Okay, enough time wasted: What’s the game like?

They're coming out of the cartridge!
So... what if I destroyed it IRL... Would I kill 'em all?

As usual, these bunnies love to break the fourth wall, so the title screen features them “inside the Nintendo 3DS”, with the cartridge in the background while various Rabbids have fun at the forefront. As for the menu, we’ve got options: “Story Mode”, “Rumble Arena”, “Collecting” and “Settings”. “Collecting” is a quick way to show all the Rabbids you’ve unlocked so far, in a place called the Bwaaah House. The “Rumble Arena” will become more interesting as you progress through the game, since you currently only have three Rabbids in the collection. Let’s go with the Story Mode!

Oh hey, we both have the exact same stats!

Story? What story? Since when are the Rabbids bothering with a complex story? They don’t have the attention span for a plot. Well, except maybe that one time... We open in the first area: Rabbid Party. The first mini-game is a tutorial explaining the combat mechanics. This is a weird mix of RPG and quick-time events. All Rabbids have a base punch attack, a special move and a status move. They also have stats for each, so perhaps their melee move is weak while their special move is stronger, or vice-versa. All Rabbids have three stats; the base attack only uses the basic (red) stat bars, while the special attacks can be influenced by the red, green or yellow bars. Your move’s power and damage depends on the difference between that move’s stat and the opponent’s affected stat. The stronger the opponent’s stat is compared to yours, the weaker your move will be. You can always use your basic attack, but the special move needs a turn to recharge. The status move can be used once per Rabbid per match, so choose your timing wisely.

Will you be lucky? Do you have a sense of timing?

It increases your attack, in case that wasn't obvious.

When you pick a move to attack the opponent, you get to a screen on which a cursor is moving around a circle. You have to press the check button when the cursor is in a colored area of the circle (which includes areas of normal damage, higher damage, and double damage). The double damage areas are smaller, and overall the circle is fair enough in that you will most likely get it right and stop the cursor in time if you’re not aiming for extra damage. If you stop the cursor in the areas without damage, your Rabbid screws up and falls on his face. Tear down the enemy Rabbid’s HP to 0, and that is all. Normally, you control a team of three Rabbids, against another team of three. In a later “Expert Training”, you also learn to use status moves (which can increase your stats, decrease the opponent’s stats, or givwe you an edge for a few turns, through a special effect). The last option is to switch out between your battlers, which doesn't wasts a turn and can give you an edge against the current opponent’s stats if yours were underwhelming in comparison.

And of course, you can fail to hit the opponent.
That can happen too!

Thankfully, this isn’t the only point of interest in the game: There are mini-games too! The Story Mode is split into seven worlds, which all contain series of mini-games, always in the same order. Each mini-game has score requirements. Beat a certain score and you get one microchip (you can get three in every mini-game, and the third one is the highest score to beat). Microchips are used to unlock battle levels, in which you face against an opposing Rabbid team.

What are the mini-games here?

Wow, this looks so... cheap.

-A rhythm game (as per the tradition of the franchise) in which you have to tap colored squares on the touch screen, following the rhythm and order in which they appear at the bottom of the top screen. These are pretty meh, but I suppose that’s the best they could do with the 3DS;
-Multiple variations on what’s basically Whack-A-Mole;

-A cow cannon in which you aim and shoot at bunnies attached to floating targets. You get more points by hitting the center, which always has a Rabbid attached to it. Oh, and you can control the cow in flight;

-A marble maze-like test in which you tilt the Nintendo 3DS up, down, left and right to make the Rabbid move around, avoid obstacles (such as spikes and electricity), beat miniature mazes (there’s always a few in each level) and reach the end. Using the 3DS’s integrated tilt detection is pretty smart;

Is there a light at the end?

-A point-and-shoot mini-game in which Rabbids, flying in the air with balloons, have to be taken down by you, moving the 3DS around and using its Augmented Reality feature (commonly seen in the pre-installed 3DS game Head Hunters) to shoot at them, as they appear in your home;

-A few mini-games requiring the AR card, such as one where you must zap Rabbids and then throw them in a black hole;

-By tilting the 3DS left and right, steer a cow in a round tunnel to hit as many Rabbids on your way as you can;

-A Rabbid Capture feature requiring the Rabbid AR Card; it will summon the bunny where you point the portable console, and you can electrocute and slap it until it’s K.O.’d and joins your team. Lost your AR card? Look for it on Google Images, or tough.

Don't hit the cows. They will be very very angry.

That’s all. Yep. Every mini-game in Rabbids Rumble is a version of either of those, re-skinned for the theme of the current world in the Story Mode. There’s literally no diversity, it’s just the same mini-games repeated over and over again, with new skins and, sometimes, an increased difficulty level. That’s pretty lazy if you ask me. Though I may be thinking this simply because every other Rabbids mini-game collection I played tried to have a diverse selection. Sure, some mini-games appeared multiple times (especially in RRR TVParty), but they still tried to have more than just a few base mini-games and copies of those. Rabbids Rumble feels lazy as a result. Let’s just slap a couple ideas of games together and repeat them until the end.

I can’t even make a Top 12 out of that! Seven worlds like this, of so few different mini-games.

Here, use this one.

Oh, and by the way, I might make some people angry, but I have to say it: I think AR cards are bullshit. I hate AR cards, because they have very few uses, they’re easy to lose, you need a table to use them… You have to hold the 3DS at a precise distance from one, and you’ll be moving constantly. If you lose focus, the AR mini-games in Rabbids Rumble will break and pause until you’re focused on the AR card again. It’s so much trouble for no good reason! Wouldn’t it have been possible to just have mini-games in which you can move the 3DS around freely, without having to focus on the damn card? What is also annoying is when Rabbids move just far enough away from the AR card that you must re-focus because you had to move away from the card to hurt a Rabbid. Sure, it stops the timer, but you need many seconds to re-focus. I guess, when it comes to Augmented Reality, the best we’re gonna get is… *pfffft!* Pokémon Go! Ha! Might as well call it a dead horse right away! 

I hope you like seeing these screens.
You cannot escape them.

Oh, and while we’re on the topic of mini-games, you know what else annoys me? Before every single mini-game, you have to read through the rules again. Unskippable pages. All you can do is press A to skip them quickly. The only reason those could be useful is when the mini-games have slight variants and new mechanics (such as pressing L or R at key points during the rhythm game). Otherwise, since all mini-games are the same basic stuff, they just keep repeating info you already know.

And so it goes, through seven worlds. In most mini-games, getting three chips is really easy. On the last few mini-games, you almost need a perfect score in order to get the third chip. And of course, you have to deal with whatever issues brought by the gimmick of the current mini-game (mostly caused by the AR card challenges).

The early microchips are VERY easy to collect.

More TP than you'll ever need... this month.

Speaking of annoying things… another item you collect in mini-games is “bandages”. Okay, the games call these bandages, but really they’re rolls of toilet paper. These bunnies sure love their TP. What’s the toilet paper for? They’re used to wake up a Rabbid that has been knocked out in a battle. Is there any other way to collect those? Nope. And the higher a Rabbid’s battle level is, the more TP it needs to wake up. So when you have a ton of KO’d Rabbids, you run out of TP quickly. Which forces you to slog through the mini-games again to collect TP, which is a grind as you only get one solitary roll at a time. Sure, there’s a lot of rolls in every mini-game, but damn if it isn’t annoying. It’s a grind. It forces you to play carefully, lest you want to waste an hour gathering enough TP to wake up your Rabbids after you got yourself into a fight you were unprepared for.

The costumes look pretty cool. Shame the base Rabbid
models are a little creepy here. Also shame that they
couldn't bother making more animations.

And so I get to the battles themselves… I’ll give this game credit where it’s due: There are 102 Rabbids to be collected, and all of them are pretty funny and creative. They each have their own name, appearance, and the game even has a little funny comment for each of them. However, they’re all the same basic Rabbid model with alterations, and it shows in the Bwah House section, in which you can look at the various Rabbids unlocked. It doesn’t matter which one you choose: On the top screen, they ALL go through the exact same animation. No variants. 102 bunnies with different looks, only one animation. L-A-Z-Y. Granted, that’s more like a series of animations done by the Rabbid, but it’s always the exact same pattern, they don’t even shake it up by randomizing the order of animations that the Rabbid can do when viewed.

Okay, so that's 9 different moves. 1/3rd of
the entire selection in the game. Cheap.

And it’s not like the combat tactics are all that special either; each Rabbid can only use one physical attack, one special attack and one status effect. I’ve only counted 5 different physical attacks. There’s a greater variety in special attacks, as I’ve counted 12 (which is still small for a game that claimed each Rabbid had its own, “unique” special move). There are 10 different status effect moves, some clever ideas in there but not much. This isn’t a wide variety of attacks. You quickly see all there is to see here. Oh, and in most cases, the enemy teams have a laughable and predictable AI, which will usually do little else than alternate between the basic move, the special move, and a chance at using the status move as early as possible, and this, for all three Rabbids on that team. They will sometimes switch between Rabbids, which doesn't waste a turn like in Pokémon, but it's usually not much help for them. It's not much help when you do it, either.

So many Rabbids, and yet so many that are nigh-impossible
to unlock... unless you and your friends are all gigantic
Rabbids fanboys.

Oh, and by the way, yes there are 102 Rabbids, but 3 are unlocked at the start and only 70 of those can be unlocked through the Story Mode, 10 per "world". There is one Rabbid that you can unlock through its QR code in the instruction manual. Where are the remaining 28? …Beats me. I’ve never figured it out. By getting into other matches? By seeking out QR codes online? Are the others unlocked that way too? The game doesn’t tell you, and I seriously have no idea.

Wait, here’s a thing I must actually do at times, as a reviewer: Actual goddamn research! Give me a few moments.

Oh?

Oh. OH.

Aw, Hell no!

Guess what: Even if you do collect the 70 bunnies from the Story Mode, you might just never get the last ones. Why? There are two ways to get them: The first is to carry around Rabbids Rumble in your 3DS (and StreetPass) on the hopes of meeting another player with the game, and challenge them… which, depending on your free time, you might have better chances of getting struck by thunder on the day you win the lottery. The second option was to own the game as soon as it came out, in 2012, and to receive a new Rabbid through Spotpass, much like the Legendary Pokémon given out by Game Freak during online events. You didn’t have the game back when they were giving out the Rabbids? Too bad for you!

Seventeen pages of Rabbids.
Five pages lost to time.

Oh, and these Rabbids are so rare that I've never seen images online of any of them. Rabbids Rumble: You're not Pokémon. Knock it off.

Wow, I started with somewhat mixed memories of this game, then my opinion of it decreased as this review went, and now I utterly despise it. I don’t think any other game took such a nosedive!

What’s the fucking point of telling you to “catch them all” if it becomes practically impossible to do so? At least, with Pokémon, you can almost always find someone to trade with you, there are many ways to get what you need. Not so much in this one. You need someone who owned the game at launch and actually got all the bonus bunnies. Christ.

I'll admit I get a kick out of slapping a Rabbid to
collect it, add it to your collection. But that
3D model up there is so damn creepy!

Okay, you know what, I’ve talked about everything, and it’s time for my final thoughts. This is bad. More than anything else, it’s disappointing. The concept is great: Rabbid fights! But it’s done in a lazy way, with too few attacks to truly differentiate the Rabbids. The battle system feels half-assed and poor as a result. The AI doesn't help. The different Rabbids look pretty cool, but there’s nothing to really differentiate them outside of the looks. Even the animations are the same.

There isn’t enough diversity in mini-games, which is sad. The Story Mode can occupy you for a few hours, beating and collecting Rabbids, but you quickly see all that the game has to offer. Sure, as you progress, more tricks are added to make said mini-games tougher, but they still boil down to the same things in the end. The toilet paper feels useless, omnipresent in every mini-game yet solely used to wake up defeated Rabbids.

There were decent ideas here, but it truly feels like the developers didn’t care for the final product and just wanted to get something out quickly. Overall, this is pretty sad. Well, chalk that one up as “That one Rabbid game I don’t like”.

Hopefully, next week will see me reviewing a better one. And hey, it’s not just any game; it’s “Rabbids Go Home”!