Quick Review: Wasted Pizza

I don't think I'll get pizza for dinner tonight.

Looks like a pretty average server search menu.

Made by Supine and released on October 16th, 2017, Wasted Pizza is a game about fresh pizzas shooting the freshness out of each other amidst a graveyard of not-fresh pizzas. Yeah, I just wrote that. The game is just that weird of an idea. For some reason, the fresh pizzas are alive and trying to kill each other. This is arguably a shooting game. I say “arguably” in part because of the silly concept so far removed from anything we know of, but also in part because… well… I couldn’t even play the damn thing.

Nobody else playing, and no X button. I'mma
be stuck here for a long time.

There was literally nobody playing, every time I tried. No open servers, no players waiting to join… You can create a private room for yourself and some friends, or you can create a server that everyone can join. Or join a game that’s being prepared. Usual multiplayer stuff. Which is cool... if there are players. Maybe the interest would have remained if there was a single-player mode, but no, there’s none of that.

That’s… uh… kind of a downer to end the Quick Reviews on. Ummmmm… what could I say about the game…well, I clicked the Quick Game button and it took me to a “waiting for other players” screen… without any Back or X button to return to the previous menu. The Escape key didn't work either. Each time, I had to shut down the game in another manner. Also, after looking for matches, I returned to the main menu… and the music started playing over itself. As in, the original loop did not stop, it kept going, and the music track started playing a second time over it, creating a cacophony.

Where am I going with this? Well, if a game can’t even get its menus right – basic mistakes like these two – then what could I have expected from gameplay? I know first impressions aren’t everything, but they can still say a lot. As you can imagine, I don’t actually have screenshots of the actual gameplay, taken from a FLV video file grabbed with OBS; the pictures that follow were taken from the Steam store page. Does this look nice?

This looks like what would have happened if Sausage
Party had been directed by Zack Snyder.

Does this look pleasant? Not very pretty, is it? Can you even figure out what’s going on here?

The green and red is a pain for the eyes,
and this is only a screenshot!

What's even supposed to be here??

Have a reminder that the game’s original release date was in 2017… and the game is still in Early Access. In that state, I could forgive several of the mistakes, as the game is still technically in development. …Is it, though? It has all the feel of a project that’s been abandoned. There could have been an interesting element here, as from what I’ve gathered the idea is that fresh pizzas can hide among the un-fresh ones and play a cool hide and seek game with each other… Too bad I couldn’t see any of it, huh?

Maybe the project isn’t over. Maybe it’ll move forward in the future. But for now, nobody’s playing this and I don’t think there’s any interest in spending money on it if there aren’t enough players to, y’know, play this multiplayer game. Yeah, I can’t really recommend this one…

But still, it’s out there if you do want to spend that dollar on it. Wasted Pizza is available for 0.99$ USD.

Oh, but wait – I skipped a game during these Quick Reviews, because I wanted to publish a full review of it. Well, tune in Friday for it!